Of course, not all gay guys have gay voice and not all guys with gay voice are gay. I say hello and it’s a done deal.” There’s even a well-known voice coach, Bob Corff, who has specialized in ridding interested parties of their gay voice, which he defines in opposition to the monotone of “straight voice.” (You can read a 2010 interview with him from the now-defunct Details on his personal site.) There’s a lovely quote in the aforementioned documentary from a young gay guy: “I love my gay voice. For many, it remains among the most blatant cultural signifiers of gayness, which I guess sucks for people who don’t want to sound gay but is great for those who do. There’s even a documentary about it, 2014’s Do I Sound Gay?, directed by David Thorpe. It has been analyzed by experts and immortalized by the likes of ’70s game-show staples Paul Lynde and Charles Nelson Reilly. You’re referencing the documented phenomenon of male “gay voice.” You know it when you hear it: sibilant s sounds, perhaps a lisp, a melodic sentence flow prone to sonic flights of fancy. I know it’s up to me to decide if I find them attractive and move ahead, but I guess I want someone to tell me that it’s possible that I’m a nincompoop here and that straight men can “sound gay.” Here are my specific fears-that one or both of these men are in denial about their gender preferences OR that I’m passing up on some fantastic men because they are indeed straight.
I can’t even tell if I sound homophobic here, but is it homophobic to be a straight woman and not want to date a gay man? See? My brain is a mess.
I am not proud of my response, which is to not want to go out with them again. This is kind of a libido killer for me, and it makes my brain spin. I have met two men who would like to date me, and they both are great! And, they both sound completely gay-like, out-of-the-closet, effeminate-speech gay. I recently started dating again and have just recently been confronted by a situation that’s left me scratching my head. Have a question? Send it to Stoya and Rich here. How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. My Husband’s Weird Nighttime Habit Is Ruining Our Relationship My Husband Says Our Sex Life Is the Cause for All of His Anxiety My Girlfriend and I Noticed the Rise of a Certain Act in “Adult” Videos. I Just Had a Jaw-Dropping Sexual Experience.
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